When you move countries for the second time in six months and you work really hard to find a new job because your visa only gives you six months to find employment so you work your network like crazy every day because recruiters are mostly rubbish and you become a little manic and crazy and then you get offered a job in fact you get offered two jobs and you take one of the jobs because the company and the people seem great and the offer and benefits are good and you think you can learn lots because all you have learnt over the past four years is how to restructure and put people out of jobs and calculate the savings of putting people out of a job so you are super excited and you feel like you are on your way again and you really looking forward to the new job and then....

It’s not good. And you want to resign in the second week but you stick it out because you have lots to learn and you aren’t a quitter and because the company is great and it’s the first company you have worked for in ten years that is making money and growing and hiring people and does something worthwhile that helps people, and, and……

You aren’t sleeping and you start to dread going to work and you don’t want to be there and you start fantasising about living by the ocean and growing your own vegetables and you have a brown thumb and, and……

You know it’s not for you but you aren’t a quitter so you stick it out a bit longer because you have to give it a proper go and maybe there is something wrong with you because it’s a really good company and the role is a great opportunity and most of the people are great and what’s wrong with you, and, and….

And you are drinking too much wine and sleeping in too long in the morning because you can’t get to sleep at night and if you do get to sleep you wake up at 3am and can’t get back to sleep but if you do get back to sleep say at 5am you then feel like the walking dead for the rest of the day and you’re exhausted but you still can’t to get to sleep at a reasonable time the next night so you are awake until 1am or 2am and, and……

And friends are telling you you are amazing and of course you are doing a good job and you are great but you don’t feel great and in fact you feel like you are doing a shitty job so in fact you do a shitty job because you believe you are doing a shitty job and, and…..

You feel like you are going crazy because you cry every day and you feel like you have forgotten how to do your job and you feel like the graduate that works in your team who basically has no experience could do a better job than you, and, and....

Your probation is ending soon and if you resign within the probationary period you only have to give one month’s notice and the thought of hanging around even for a month is filling you with anxiety but if you go over your probation period because by some miracle you are good enough to have your employment confirmed when you are doing a shitty job you have to give three month’s notice and you know you will need pharmaceuticals and professional psychological help to get through three months not that there is anything wrong with pharmaceutials and psychological help but you can’t even contemplate this because basically the past 12 months of your career have been so awful and you can't continue to be in an awful situation, and….

And so by some miracle when you finally make the decision to resign the job that is causing untold anxiety even if you are you hopeless and have resigned yourself to never working again your network that you manically built over three months ago is still working for you and you have some potential jobs lined up and other people contacting you about jobs and you are lucky enough to be offered a contract until the end of the year with people who you like and you are able to negotiate a 4-day work week which fills you with joy and happiness and immense gratitude and you work out you do know how to do your job and if fact you are ok at it and perhaps even good at it and the world is ok again……

That.